Six years ago, I sat down and made a checklist in my journal
(or, at least my attempt at a journal). My goal? To write down the qualities I wanted
in a life partner. After a failed marriage and a shitty relationship that was
wrong from the beginning, I found myself a bit hopeless that the passion for
which I was searching actually existed. Then I received some of the best advice
ever from my mom’s best friend. She told me I have the power to create my
perfect; I was young, passionate, willing to take risks – and had a blank
slate. So, before I fell asleep that night I wrote down a list of things I wanted
for my life. And then forgot I did it.
It was a little less than a year later when my now husband –
then (very dreamy) boyfriend – and I moved into our first apartment together.
As I unpacked my things, I came across the book I tried to turn into a journal –
and opened it directly to that submission. Then, with tears running down my
face, I looked up at JF and realized I had in fact created my perfect. Before
me, in our own kitchen, stood a man who made me laugh, loved children, knew how
to love and communicate, was respectful and passionate. And, after two moves
(one that took us more than 1,000 miles from the first), one child, a marriage,
several new jobs – and many other experiences along the way – nothing has
changed.
As I looked at this man’s face on Father’s Day, I was filled
with love and gratitude. Not only for the unrelenting love he feels for me, but
for the love he gives to his children. He is strict but loving; fun and
educational; never afraid to say how much he loves them (and, even as
important, never holds back saying the same to me in front of them); fair and
respectful. Our son tells me he loves the way I look, what I’m wearing and glad
that I’m his mamma – and that is fully due to the love JF demonstrates and
encourages every day.
There is no other man I would want to celebrate as the father of my child (and maybe even someday children). I am humbled by the universe, and the opportunity it gave me to create my own perfect. Six years later, and it is still perfection.
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